The Challenges and struggles in life!

We have been visiting with a special young couple that just had their first baby about three and half weeks ago and it passed away about 10 days ago. They knew early in the pregnancy that the baby would have deformities   They chose not to abort the baby as they were encouraged to do, but instead carry it and give birth. The baby was taken several weeks early as the mother developed high blood pressure.

At his birth they were told he would probably pass away within 24 hrs and nothing was done to keep him going,  but he surprised everyone and kept living and breathing so they hooked him up to oxygen, IV fluids and other monitors in the baby intensive care unit. He had such a sweet spirit and kept fighting to live so he became the Hero of the NICU.  Even with some deformities the parents loved that baby. The parents would stroke him, talk to him and sing to him.  They so loved their little boy and it was obvious that he loved them. Finally they could hold him and snuggle him and kiss him for a little while at a time and she could pump breast milk and tube feed it to him.  They purchased a small stuffed animal to put in the incubator with him.   Most of their family members lived too far away so they were mostly by themselves with the ward members supporting them well. 

A couple of times they thought they would loose him but he kept going.  Finally he became too weak to struggle further   They told the parents he was getting too weak to keep fighting and all the NICU things were just prolonging his misery--even just giving him oxygen made him struggle more.  So  the parents decided they wanted to take him home where it was peaceful and quiet with no bells and whistles to keep disturbing him and where they could enjoy him as a little family even if only for a short time.  Carefully they transported him home and took oxygen just in case he needed it.

 After arriving at home, they held him, talked with him, hugged him, kissed him and sang to him.  The Dad talked to him of wanting to throw the football with him and other things and would miss him but was so glad they had been able to spend time together for awhile. The mother told him she loved carrying him in her tummy and holding and feeding him since birth and that she would miss him terribly.  They carefully placed him in his darling little crib with his stuffed  animal to sleep and the parents went to bed where they were able to relax for the first time in weeks. When the mother awakened, she knew even before looking that he had passed away.

 This couple is a special couple.  They have been members for one to two years. It meant so much to them when their home teacher told them that the main purposes we come to earth is to get a body and have choices.  They gave him that opportunity. 

They were also very happy and grateful for us to give them this article from the church web site that explained that when we are resurrected we will receive a perfected body

    http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/special-lessons?lang=eng&query=Elder+Rasband,+"special+lessons"

(if you can't get this,  let me know and I will copy and paste the article)

They were also happy to know that the mothers will be able to raise their children, who passed away in childhood after they are resurrected.  This is found here:

Teachings of the Presidents of the Church;  Joseph Smith Chapter 14, Words of consolation at the time of Death.   
http://www.lds.org/manual/teachings-joseph-smith/chapter-14?lang=eng

I will quote this here:

"President Joseph F. Smith, the sixth President of the Church, reported: “Joseph Smith taught the doctrine that the infant child that was laid away in death would come up in the resurrection as a child; and, pointing to the mother of a lifeless child, he said to her: ‘You will have the joy, the pleasure and satisfaction of nurturing this child, after its resurrection, until it reaches the full stature of its spirit.’ …

“In 1854, I met with my aunt [Agnes Smith], the wife of my uncle, Don Carlos Smith, who was the mother of that little girl [Sophronia] that Joseph Smith, the Prophet, was speaking about, when he told the mother that she should have the joy, the pleasure, and the satisfaction of rearing that child, after the resurrection, until it reached the full stature of its spirit; and that it would be a far greater joy than she could possibly have in mortality, because she would be free from the sorrow and fear and disabilities of mortal life, and she would know more than she could know in this life. I met that widow, the mother of that child, and she told me this circumstance and bore testimony to me that this was what the Prophet Joseph Smith said when he was speaking at the funeral of her little daughter.”^8''

We attended the viewing and the graveside service Wednesday sept 5. It was an open casket and the baby was dressed so darling in a baby blue suit and blanket.  It was so touching to see how much the mother and father loved this baby. There was such a strong sweet loving spirit there.  I felt at the viewing and graveside service that the baby was very grateful and happy that his parents gave him life.

Visiting with them in their home later,  I related to them an experience that I had  about 30 years ago.

"I remember attending a meeting where A woman from the Relief Society General Board who helped intitate the adoption services for the church spoke and told the story of speaking in England about the adoption program the church has and she was wondering why she was the one asked to do this.  After the meeting a young women from the audience came up to her and told her that as she was speaking,  the young women's mind opened up and she saw a large congregation all dressed in white in a large room.  The Savior stood at the front said,  "we need someone to go down and start this program.  The women who spoke raised her hand along with several others.  The Savior looked at her and said,  "yes,  I think you can do this."  and choose her." 

That story has meant to me that we both volunteer and are chosen for our missions in life and I feel  that this sweet baby volunteered and was chosen to come to them in this manner. 

They now have a burning desire to set their lives in order so they can go to the temple to be sealed as an eternal family as soon as possible.

These pictures are the copies of the program for the beloved infant.